I was editing an old post about angular Venus in the natal chart and it got me thinking about relationships in general and Venus aspects. The trouble with Aphrodite is that she describes an archetype within us that is deeply attracted to certain other planetary archetypes. This isn’t a wholly negative thing, but when Venus forms hard aspects in the natal chart we sometimes have to live out the more troubled side of Venus in relation to those planets. Venus is the planet of relationships and responds to what we find attractive, valuable and lovable in others.

Take for example the Venus square Neptune aspect that shows up in Pamela Anderson’s, Whitney Houston’s and Tina Turner’s horoscope. All of these women have been involved in violent and abusive relationships. The men have usually been in the music business and have been involved in drink or drugs. Neptune is a significator in the horoscope for creativity, and also addiction and escapism. When you think of Venus-Neptune aspects in the chart you tend to think of a soul-mate connection, and a love that knows no boundaries; a deep and compassionate meeting of two people. However, Neptune in the horoscope also reveals where we are lacking in boundaries, and when connected to Venus it reveals itself in relationships.

The saviour/martyr archetype of Neptune is lived out through the attraction to unstable men who need some form of rescuing. Neptune has a powerful need in relationships for redemption, and has a natural empathy and compassion for lovers (Venus), but the difficult side of this contact is allowing themselves to be victimised. All the archetypal themes of sacrifice and suffering and powerlessness of Neptune permeates into the image of the loved one. The relationship may be wrapped around images of victimisation and redemption, and with Neptune there is a powerful need for emotional unity in relationships and this can be the central principle to attracting a relationship that is deeply addictive and suffocating at the same time.

Neptune describes our longing for perfection and divine connection and so it makes me wonder why some Venus-Neptune's end up in the most imperfect of relationships. Venus-Neptune can romanticise even the most unromantic of situations and all this is aided by Neptune’s longing, and intrinsic need to be loved. Neptune also casts delusions, denial and deception, and is most resistant to concrete definitions and analytical observations. Neptune represents our place of salvation from life and in connection to Venus this is often found through a partner.

Venus-Neptune in the natal chart needs to be armed with a life-jacket when swimming the depths of the ocean with a significant other, but there is nothing like drowning even in the sweetest of our sorrows. Poetry and music and art all express such longing, bliss and disappointment so beautifully, and they wouldn’t be felt in exactly the same way without Neptune. Not all Venus-Neptune relationships are difficult and some are blissfully happy, and have found a soul-mate and feel complete in a partnership. Neptune is capable of great sacrifice and devotion in a relationship. Venus-Neptune relationships can experience states of ecstasy and are highly addictive, but there is also the ‘come down’  that has to be faced when the person has realised the partner is mortal just like everybody else.

When Neptune is involved in relationships this is the place we tend to be the victim, taken advantage of, drained of money and sympathy, held in bondage through sympathy and made to feel obligated to others by a sense of guilt for others’ sins. In Neptune's relationships we may find a woman who stays in a violent relationship, supports the drug addict or stays with a sick partner. Whether this is through a sense of obligation or guilt is difficult to determine, and it could be motivated through pure compassion and sensitivity to another's pain.